Let’s look at the pros and cons of outsourcing editing overseas to countries such as India and the Philippines.

Pros of outsourcing editing to an offshore editor

You can probably save money by getting your editing done overseas. Editors in countries such as India and the Philippines will charge substantially less. So even if you go through an outsourcing broker based in Australia the cost will be lower.

Cons of outsourcing editing to an offshore editor

An editor in India or the Philippines might have good command of English spelling, grammar and punctuation. The problem is how much English can vary from country to country. The only way to know these subtleties is to live in the country where the book or document will be published. It’s not as simple as setting your language preferences in Word to Australian English. It really takes an Australian-based editor (or one who has lived here for a number of years) to know how English is spoken and written in Australia.

An editor based in India or the Philippines, who has never lived in Australia, won’t know these subtleties and it will show in their editing. The same will be true of a US editor who tries to edit text for Australian readers or Australian editor who tries to edit text for British readers. Besides the obvious spelling differences, the editors won’t know the nuances of English outside their own countries. This is why Australian publishers hire Australian editors to localise books that were written in the US or UK. They realise that a local editor is needed to revise the publication for the Australian market.  

In addition to spelling and grammar, each English-speaking country has its own style conventions. To edit Australian publications, you need to know these in depth.

For example, the commonly accepted styles for punctuating and capitalising points in bulleted lists differ between countries (see how it should be done in Australia). If an overseas editor doesn’t know these styles, the work won’t be satisfactory. Another example of one of these idiosyncrasies is how time is expressed. In Australia, the accepted style to use a full stop (a period for American readers) between the hour and minute (for example, 5.30). In the United States, the accepted style is to use a colon between the hour and minute (5:30).

There are hundreds of these minor stylistic points that you need to know to correctly edit publications for the Australian market.

Communication barriers are another drawback to outsourcing editing to an overseas editor. In many cases, editing is a collaborative effort between the writer and editor. Trying to communicate with someone overseas about a project can be challenging.

A low hourly rate for editing overseas won’t necessarily translate into a low project price. In the 4-Hour Work Week, Timothy Ferris describes how he had some bad experiences outsourcing to overseas providers. He noted that although the hourly rate was low, it sometimes took substantially more time to get the work done. Whether the hours it took were overstated or it did take longer than expected to complete the work, this is a risk you take when outsourcing to an overseas editor.

Weighing the pros and cons of outsourcing to overseas editors

Before you make a decision, it’s important to weigh the pros and cons of outsourcing editing overseas. If price is your only consideration, then it might be the right decision.

If you’re looking for high quality and someone who understands local usage and style conventions, then outsourcing to an overseas editor is not the way to go.

In The Lost Art of a Great Speech, Richard Dowis describes seven ways to effectively conclude a speech. Understanding these will give you more options the next time you’re struggling to write a speech ending.

Dowis defines the types of speech conclusions as:

• summary
• humorous
• wrap up
• direct appeal
• thesis
• reference
• inspirational.

Let’s take a brief look at each of these.

With a summary closing you simply summarise the points that you detailed in the body of the speech. This can be effective because it reinforces what you have said. So if you cover three main points in your speech, you can write a few sentences on each point for the ending.

A humorous closing can work well when you find a quotation or anecdote that relates to your speech topic. Humour that is not relevant to the topic, either for the opening or conclusion, will often detract from a speech. If you can’t think of anything funny, there are many websites with quotations and anecdotes on almost any topic. Just search for them.

With a wrap up closing you repeat or mention an opening element to create a complete loop. This could be a fact, anecdote or quotation that you opened the speech with. Listeners will recognise this repetition as a verbal cue. As soon as you mention it, they will realise that your speech is coming to an end.

When using a direct appeal closing you ask the audience to take specific action. At a graduation ceremony, for example, a speaker might ask the new graduates to take a particular action or change their outlook as they begin their careers.

With a thesis closing you restate the main idea of your speech. This type of conclusion is effective when you’re attempting to persuade your audience on one important point.

When using a reference closing you mention the group you are speaking to, the location, date, a quotation or other point that connects you with your audience. If you’re speaking to a community service group, for example, you can research the organisation and mention their history, philosophy or achievements to reinforce the connection between you and the audience.

With an inspirational closing you use an inspirational quotation, poem or anecdote to end the speech. There are many reference websites where you can search for inspirational quotations, poems and stories by subject or author.

For instance, if you were speaking about goal achievement and wanted to inspire your audience, you might quote Thoreau, who said, “If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life that he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.”

It’s important to note that you can combine elements from the different types of conclusions when crafting your speech ending. For example, you can inspire your listeners with a quotation or story, and then make a call to action.

Writing an effective speech conclusion is important. But the ending can be the most difficult part. After completing the opening and body of the speech, it’s easy to run out of ideas and get stuck. Knowing the seven options available when ending a speech will help you overcome these challenges to create effective speeches with maximum impact.

In previous posts we looked at the importance of keeping your business writing as simple as possible.  An easy way to improve your writing is to remove unnecessary words when editing. Tautologies are one form of redundancy in writing and speaking that you can easily spot and remove once you are aware of them.

The Macquarie Dictionary defines a tautology as a “needless repetition of an idea, especially in other words in the immediate context, without imparting additional force or clearness”.

Examples of tautologies include:

• free gift
• necessary requirement
• adequate enough
• new innovation
• forward planning
• pair of twins (unless you mean two sets of twins)
• short summary
• ATM machine
• unexpected surprise
• past history
• poisonous venom
• 5.00 am in the morning
• reiterate again
• joint cooperation
• safe haven
• added bonus
• $500 dollars
• PIN number.

Removing tautologies in your business writing is one way to make it more clear and prevent it from being redundant and superfluous.

Aristotle’s Rhetoric is a prime example. In the book, Aristotle describes three essential elements of rhetoric: ethos, pathos and logos. Understanding these and applying them in your business writing and speaking will help you persuade your readers and listeners when you are promoting your products, services and ideas.

What is rhetoric?

Despite its negative image, rhetoric is the art of writing or speaking effectively. There are many rhetorical appeals a writer can use. Aristotle broadly defined these as:

• ethos – authority, credibility, character
• pathos – emotion, identity, self-interest
• logos – logic, reason.

According to Aristotle, any attempt to persuade your audience when writing or speaking should include all of these.

How you can apply Aristotle’s ideas to your business writing

Let’s look at a few examples of how you can use ethos, pathos and logos in your business writing and speaking.

Ethos

Ethos can be applied in many ways in your business writing and presentations to gain authority and credibility.

Your website is a great place to establish your credibility. You can do this is on your About Us page by showing your readers what you have achieved. This might be a list of satisfied clients, customer testimonials, projects you have completed successfully, industry or professional awards you have won, or profiles highlighting the skills and knowledge of your key personnel. Any of these will build your credibility and authority in the eyes or your readers.

If speaking at a public event, you can establish your ethos by the way you are introduced. The best way to ensure this is to write your own introduction, or at least list the main points that you want mentioned. These might include your educational achievements, previous roles, your current responsibilities, and recognitions or awards.

Pathos

Many writers believe that pathos is the most important of the three appeals. Emotion can be introduced in many direct or subtle ways.

If writing a case study about your product or service, you can emphasise the frustration or discomfort the customer experienced before discovering your solution. If potential customers suffer from similar problems, they will connect with the emotional side of the case study.

A recent occupational health and safety television commercial by WorkSafe Victoria appealed to the emotions by showing us a workplace accident scene and then switching to a family waiting for the husband and father to return from work. You’re not sure if he’s been hurt and you feel worried for the family. He returns safely in the end, but you get strong emotional reminder of the importance of safe work practices and environments.

Logos

Whether you want people to buy your products or agree with your ideas, you need to use some form of logic or reasoning in your business writing.

If you’re writing a brochure about your product, you can show how much time, money or effort it saves your customers. In many cases, you will want to use statistical data to make your point. To be more credible it will help to have third-party party confirmation – for example, from a customer or industry association.

A website of a major insurance provider points out that 80 per cent of Australians are underinsured and lists the source of the statistic as a survey conducted by a government agency. This fact will make readers think: “Am I one of the 80 per cent? Chances are that I am, and I need to do something about it.”

Combining authority, emotion and reason in your business writing and presentations

Choosing the right mix of ethos, pathos and logos is the key to persuasive writing and speaking. How you combine the three will depend on the product, the service or idea you’re promoting, and your audience. Business managers, for example, often need to make a logical case for purchasing a new solution to a problem, so business-to-business products and services require a rational justification. Many consumer products and services tend to be promoted on an emotional level. If you’re selling a relaxing holiday on the beach or expensive jewellery, you will want to focus on the emotional side of your offering.

In this editing blog post we’ll give a definition of copy editing (also spelled copy-editing and copyediting) and use examples to show what a copy editor does to improve consistency throughout a document and prepare it for publication.

Definition of copy editing

As we wrote in a previous editing blog post, the Australian Style manual for authors editors and printers defines copy editing as follows:

The purpose of copy editing is to remove the mistakes, inconsistencies or other infelicities of expression that could irritate of confuse readers—or embarrass the author. At the copy editing stage, the editor therefore concentrates on the details of language, spelling and punctuation; on achieving consistency of style and layout; and on checking references, illustrations tables, headings, sequences, links, and preliminary matter and end matter.

Scope of copy editing

The Style manual broadly defines copy editing tasks in four areas: language, consistency, references and functionality.

Copy editing language

When copy editing language, the copy editor will find and correct errors of grammar, spelling and punctuation. In addition, the copy editor will look for clarity of meaning. In some instances, the copy editor might feel that the work needs substantive editing or should be sent back to the author for rewriting.

Copy editing for language consistency

Copy editing for language consistency requires more than knowledge of grammar, spelling and punctuation. The copy editor needs to ensure the publication is consistent throughout. Copy editing for consistency covers aspects such as terminology, spelling, capitalisation, hyphenation, shortened forms and quantitative information.

Let’s look at some of these.

There are quite a few words can be spelt two or more ways correctly. If we were publishing an article about copy editing, for example, we would want to use the same spelling (copy editing) throughout. Depending on the dictionary you use, the term can also be spelt copy-editing and copyediting. Another example is online, which can also be spelt on-line.

One of the tasks of a copy editor is to choose which spelling to use and make it consistent throughout the document. Some organisations will have a style sheet that shows the preferred spelling of common words. Publishing houses and universities usually have a preferred dictionary (such as Macquarie or Oxford in Australia) that should be used when choosing between alternate spellings.

Copy editing for consistency covers the small details (that many writers don’t think about) such as dashes. For example, the Style manual for authors, editors and printers suggest that em dashes (long dashes such as this —) be used as follows to set apart an explanatory phrase in a sentence.

National policies may change the decision-making environment—water licensing reform is an example—or provide guidance on suitable areas for government investment.

These and other types of dashes are often used incorrectly and inconsistently throughout documents. Copy editors find examples such as the following that need to be corrected.

National policies may change the decision-making environment - water licensing reform is an example - or provide guidance on suitable areas for government investment.

National policies may change the decision-making environment – water licensing reform is an example – or provide guidance on suitable areas for government investment.

Abbreviated forms often require correction for consistency during copy editing.

For example, in one section of a document the abbreviation of information technology, I.T., might include full stops (called periods in the USA), while in another IT doesn’t have full stops.

Many consistency issues are the result of collaborative efforts when different people or departments contribute to different parts of a publication. One person prefers to write IT, while another prefers I.T.

One way to prevent this problem—and make copy editing easier and less expensive— is to have a house style guide (also called a style sheet) that lists the preferred ways of spelling and abbreviating. You can also spell out general rules, such as ‘Abbreviations should not include full stops’.

Numbers are another factor that a copy editor needs to look at when copy editing. Do you spell out numbers as words or do you use numerals? The Australian Style Manual recommends using words for the numbers one through one-hundred and writing higher numbers as numerals (when the document is not statistically oriented).

Bulleted lists are one potentially confusing element that an editor will correct to make consistent throughout a publication. Do you capitalise each bulleted point? Do you put a full stop or semi-colon at the end of each one? A copy editor will know the correct styles and apply them throughout the document (for more information on formatting bulleted lists see Editing and Proofreading: Bulleted Lists).

Copy editing for language and consistency is a time-consuming process. Besides checking and correcting spelling, punctuation and grammar, the copy editor needs to look for consistency throughout the document. A few of the elements that are checked for consistency during the copy editing process are spelling, dashes, abbreviations, numbers and bulleted lists.

When calling on the services of a freelance copy editor, it’s important to remember that copy editing requires more than checking for the basic mistakes. The time and cost estimates you receive for copy editing services might seem high, but there is much more to the process than meets the eye. Also, it doesn’t pay to cut corners by sending your work offshore (such as to India or the Philippines) for editing. It’s unlikely that offshore editors will understand the style conventions used in your country, whether you’re in Australia, the UK or the USA.

Here are a few quotations about editors that might answer these questions. You probably will recognise some of the well-known writers who have offered their opinions on editors—some positive, some not.

A good editor understands what you’re talking and writing about and doesn’t meddle too much.

Irwin Shaw

A good many young writers make the mistake of enclosing a stamped, self-addressed envelope, big enough for the manuscript to come back in. This is too much of a temptation to the editor.

Ring Lardner

A good novel editor is invisible.

Terri Windling

A literary journal is intended to connect writer with reader; the role of the editor is to mediate.

John Barton

A very good editor is almost a collaborator.

Ken Follett

Always point your finger at the chest of the person with whom you are being.  An editor becomes kind of your mother. You expect love and encouragement from an editor.

Jackie Kennedy

An editor is someone who separates the wheat from the chaff and then prints the chaff.

Adlai E. Stevenson

And that’s another piece of advice I’ll give junior writers; when you get to the point where they take you to lunch, let the editor suggest where to go.

Jerry Pournelle

Anyone nit-picking enough to write a letter of correction to an editor doubtless deserves the error that provoked it.

Alvin Toffler

Book writing is a little different because, in my case, my editor is a year younger than me and basically has the same sensibility as me.

Chuck Klosterman

But for me, being an editor I’ve been an editor of all kinds of books being an editor of poetry has been the way in which I could give a crucial part of my time to what I love most.

Peter Davison

Dealing with poetry is a daunting task, simply because the reason one does it as an editor at all is because one is constantly coming to terms with one’s own understanding of how to understand the world.

Peter Davison

Dullness is the only crime for which an editor ought to be hung.

Josephus Daniels

Editor: a person employed by a newspaper, whose business it is to separate the wheat from the chaff, and to see that the chaff is printed.

Elbert Hubbard

I feel sorry for people who have to edit me. Which is why book writing is by far the most enjoyable. Really the only thing it’s based on is whether it’s good or not. No book editor, in my experience, is getting a manuscript and trying to rewrite it.

Chuck Klosterman

I remember when an editor at the National Geographic promised to run about a dozen of my landscape pictures from a story on the John Muir trail as an essay, but when the group of editors got together, someone said that my pictures looked like postcards.

Galen Rowell

I was surprised that my wife thought it was a good idea, then again with my agent, another woman, then my editor, another woman – in spite of the fact that all three of them reacted positively I still have this fear.

Michael Chabon

 I’m a writer first and an editor second… or maybe third or even fourth. Successful editing requires a very specific set of skills, and I don’t claim to have all of them at my command.

Lynn Abbey

If every editor turns you down, maybe you should take a second look at your text, however, just in case.

Piers Anthony

It is also one of the pleasures of oral biography, in that the reader, rather than editor, is jury.

George Plimpton

My only claim to fame, if I have one, is that I’m an editor.

Woody Herman

Not too many people know who the editor is.

Julius Schwartz

Publishing your work is important. Even if you are giving a piece to some smaller publication for free, you will learn something about your writing. The editor will say something, friends will mention it. You will learn.

Tim Cahill

Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.

T.S. Eliot quotes (American born English Editor, Playwright, Poet and Critic, 1888-1965)

SYCOPHANT, n. One who approaches Greatness on his belly so that he may not be commanded to turn and be kicked. He is sometimes an editor.

Ambrose Bierce

An editor should tell the author his writing is better than it is. Not a lot better, a little better.

T.S. Eliot (American born English Editor, Playwright, Poet and Critic, 1888-1965)

How often we recall, with regret, that Napoleon once shot at a magazine editor and missed him and killed a publisher. But we remember with charity that his intentions were good.

Mark Twain  (American Humorist, Writer and Lecturer. 1835-1910)

I know many journalists who would like to comment on the deep structure of their profession and its suck-up to advertisers, not to mention the dominant social order. But their editors won’t let them.

Richard Goldstein

Writers take words seriously-perhaps the last professional class that does-and they struggle to steer their own through the crosswinds of meddling editors and careless typesetters and obtuse and malevolent reviewers into the lap of the ideal reader.

John Updike (American writer, b.1932)

Editors are constantly on the watch to discover new talents in old names.

Israel Zangwill (English Writer, 1864-1926)

Let’s look at a few examples of unruly sentences and see how we can improve them by editing.

The following sentence is 28 words long.

Selling is both an art and a science, and thinking that sales success will happen overnight is a common cause of cash flow problems for the small business.

It’s not too long, and it can easily be divided into two sentences to improve readability.

Selling is both an art and a science. Thinking that sales success will happen overnight is a common cause of cash flow problems for the small business.

The next sentence is 46 words long.

Small business competes with big business, and whilst small businesses may not be able to offer regular promotions or share options, they may be able to offer other attractive benefits such as a friendlier work environment, more flexibility, greater responsibility, a parking space or family-oriented policies.

By cutting this sentence into three sentences, we reduce the average length to 15 words and increase readability.

Small business competes with big business. Whilst small businesses may not be able to offer regular promotions or share options, they may be able to offer other attractive benefits. These might include a friendlier work environment, more flexibility, greater responsibility, a parking space or family-oriented policies.

On the Flesch Reading Ease Scale (explained in an earlier post, How to Improve the Readability of Your Business Writing) the 46-word sentence above has a readability of 0 out of 100, while the edited version has a readability of 24 out of 100 (with 100 being the most readable).

Generally, when you see many conjunctions (such as and, but, yet, or, so) it’s a good clue that sentences might be too long. In many cases you can end a sentence and begin a new one where you find one of these conjunctions.

One common error we see when editing business writing is the use of the conjunctive adverb however to splice two sentences together.

For example:

I have completed the proposal, however I have not submitted it.  (incorrect)

I have completed the proposal. However, I have not submitted it.  (correct)

I have completed the proposal; however, I have not submitted it.  (correct)

Avoiding long sentences is also important when writing promotional copy.

Try reading the following 53-word sentence.

Drawing back on our years of experience in consulting to businesses in array of issues, from ISO 9001 to business design and strategy, we developed a unique methodology that offers you a real quality solution for your ISO needs, without the expensive price tag that is usually attached to quality ISO 9001 systems.

With a little editing we can divide it into two sentences with an average length of 21.5 words per sentence.

We have drawn on extensive consulting experience ─ from ISO 9001 to business design and strategy ─ to develop a unique methodology that offers a quality solution to your ISO needs. We provide this without the typical high cost of quality ISO 9001 systems.

We also reduced the text by 10 words (from 53 to 43) without losing any meaning.

When using Microsoft Word, you can quickly determine the average sentence length of your business writing.

Take the following steps to show the readability statistics, which include average sentence length, at the end of the Spelling and Grammar check.

In Word 2007:

1. Click the Microsoft Office Button , and then click Word Options.
2. Click Proofing.
3. Make sure Check grammar with spelling is selected.
4. Under When correcting grammar in Word, select the Show readability statistics check box.

 In Word 2003:

1. On the Tools menu, click Options, and then click the Spelling & Grammar tab.
2. Select the Check grammar with spelling check box.
3. Select the Show readability statistics check box, and then click OK.
4. On the Standard toolbar, click Spelling and Grammar .

The speech opening is where you have the best chance to build a bridge of understanding between you and your audience. But how do you connect with a new audience when delivering a speech?

In The Lost Art of  the Great Speech, Richard Dowis describes what he calls reference opening to establish common ground between the speaker and the audience. When using a reference opening, the speaker usually makes reference to the speech, the group, the event or something related to one of these.

Some of the possible references you can use are the date, the location, the weather, the organisation you are delivering your speech to, a historical event, a current event, the topic, and the speech title.

Dowis shows how one executive speaking at a forum sponsored by the JC Penney Company, a US department store chain, used a reference opening in his speech.

I’m honoured to have been invited to represent the credit-reporting industry in this discussion of consumer credit. At the outset, I want to commend the JC Penney organisation for its sponsorship of this forum. I can recall many years ago reading about the late JC Penney. He was a dynamic man whose success in building one of the great retail enterprises of all time is testimony to the enormous potential of a free economic system. Mr Penney was also a man whose concern for people and society was apparent throughout his long and productive life.

Another example of a reference opening is found in 50 High Impact Speeches and Remarks by Michael Kador. He shows how Michael Askew, Vice Chairman of United Parcel Service, used a reference opening when he spoke at the Annual Meeting of the Air & Waste Management Association.

It is truly an honour to be addressing an organisation that has done so much to further our understanding of the environment. And you’ve done so in a way that promotes working cooperation among businesses, governments and communities.

What I find most impressive is that you’ve been doing this for 92 years. You don’t stick around 92 years unless you’re doing something right. We’re very aware of that at UPS.

In fact, the Air & Waste Management Association and UPS probably have more in common than you might think. For starters, we each were both founded way back in 1907 at a time when most environmental philosophies governing business and society were fledgling, at best.

This opening highlights what the speaker’s company has in common with the organisation he is addressing. It was a fortunate coincidence that both were founded in the same year, but you can usually find some point that connects you, or your organisation, to the audience.

As mentioned, location can be the basis for a reference opening. The following example from Dowis shows how an executive based in Atlanta used a location reference to connect with his audience in Chicago.

It’s good to be here in the company of such distinguished men and women in the great city of Chicago. Back in Atlanta, we refer to Chicago as the ‘other city the works.’ Chicago and Atlanta do have a great deal in common, quite apart from being the economic and cultural capitals of their respective regions of the country. Atlanta was burned in 1864 by a Yankee general named Sherman; Chicago was burned in 1871 by Mrs O’Leary’s cow.

Dowis also shows how to use literary references in a speech opening to connect with the speech topic. An executive of a forest products company used a literary reference when speaking to the company’s shareholders.

Dr Pangloss, a character in Voltaire’s Candide, was fond of the statement: “All’s for the best in the best of all possible worlds.”

Well, in the field of for-sale residential construction, in finance, and in many other areas for which I have responsibility, we are close to, if not in, the best of all possible worlds.

If you’re having trouble finding a reference opening to help you connect with your audience, you can always try using the date of your presentation as a reference. Sites such as Today-In-History (http://www.scopesys.com/anyday/) list important events, births and deaths that occurred on each day of the year. You might be able to find an event that is relevant to your speech topic or audience in some way.

The options for creating an effective reference opening are as boundless as your imagination and creativity. Writing an effective reference opening requires thought, planning and research. The effort spent, however, will help you get your messages across to receptive and attentive audiences.

It depends on your products and the type of buyers you’re targeting.

One helpful guide I have used over the years is How to Write Powerful Catalog Copy by Herschell Gordon Lewis. In the book, Lewis defines the fourteen main catalogue copywriting styles, and when it’s best to use each one.

Although the book was published twenty years ago, the ideas presented are just as applicable today.

Lewis defines the fourteen copywriting styles as:

1. Jes Folk
2. Down Home Personality
3. You-You-You
4. Shout
5. Quietly Upscale
6. Image All The Way
7. Touchstone
8. Narrative
9. Minimalist
10. All The Facts
11. Informational Educational
12. Snob Appeal
13. I Am The Greatest
14. Plain Vanilla

Lewis uses a fictitious Tex-Mex salsa product to show the 14 catalogue copywriting styles.

Jes Folk Copy

Although the Jes Folk copywriting style is easy to read and entertaining, Lewis warns that readers can get tired of it after a few pages.

I went all the way down to Matamoros to sample this ‘Tex-Mex’ salsa, and danged if it isn’t  hotter than an El Paso afternoon. We don’t call it “Hell-Fire” Sauce for nothin’, and it if don’t give your tastebuds a pretty strong bite, you got us beat before we start.

Down Home Copy

Lewis notes that this style of copywriting makes readers feel that they are being addressed directly, but it might be difficult to come up with interesting stories for all products in a catalogue.

My aunt Maria vacationed in Mexico and was so excited she phoned me. “I’ve found the hottest ‘Tex-Mex’ salsa I’ve ever tasted,” she said. “It’s wonderful. I bought a case, and I think you ought to have it in the catalog.” Aunt Maria isn’t often wrong, so we made an exclusive arrangement with the small Mexican company that makes “Hell-Fire” Sauce. If you’re brave…or if you love real Mexican sauce…you have to get some.

You-You-You Copy

This style of copywriting, which addresses the reader by repeating the word ‘you’, is promoted in many copywriting books. Lewis believes it can work in catalogues but becomes repetitive if you have many items to sell.

You think you’ve tasted hot pepper salsa? Oh, no, you haven’t. That is, you haven’t tasted the real salsa until you’ve dipped a spoon into our “Hell-Fire” Sauce and sprinkled a little on your salad. Your tongue will tell you: You never knew a hot sauce could be this good.

Shout Copy

Shout copy is the easiest to write (and requires many exclamation marks).

A Hell-Fire Deal on “Hell-Fire” Salsa! 14-ounce bottle, $2.49!

Quietly Upscale Descriptive Copy

According to Lewis, this style of copywriting was popular during the early 1980s when baby boomer yuppies, its main targets, were past their status-seeking phase.

For your next party, this unusually hot sauce with the unusually hot name can be the evening’s hottest topic of conversation.

“Hell-Fire” isn’t for everybody. In fact, we don’t recommend its daily use, because it makes every other sauce seem so tame…

Image All the Way Copy

This style of copywriting ties a known person or place with your offering, and is less subtle than Quietly Upscale Descriptive copy.

If JP Morgan and John D Rockefeller came to your home, they’d know whether to stay for the authentic Mexican dinner you’ve prepared. “Hell-Fire” on the table means genuine “Tex-Mex” on the palate.

Touchstone Copy

When copywriting using the Touchstone style, you connect your product to a known base, called a touchstone.

In 1912 the Mexican bandit and folk hero Pancho Villa escaped to the United States. After his triumphant return in 1913 he formed the famous Division del Norte. One of the prizes he brought across the border was a recipe unlike any tasted before: “Hell-Fire.” When Villa became governor of the state of Chihuahua, he served this unique hot sauce to special guests at his dinner table. Now you can serve it to your special guests.

Minimalist Copy

This style of copywriting works well when you have limited space, such as a digest style catalogue.

Famous “Hell-Fire” Salsa–the very hottest. 14-oz. bottle, $2.49.

All the Facts Copy

Lewis writes that this style of copywriting is based on two assumptions: 1) The more the reader knows, the more likely they are to buy your products. 2) The more you tell, the more the reader will believe you. All the Facts copy is well-suited to business-to-business catalogues and websites, because business buying decisions tend to be more logic based, and the buyer usually needs to justify the decision to another person in the organisation.

“Hell-Fire” Salsa–Bottled in limited quantities in Matamoros, this authentic “Tex-Mex” salsa combines red peppers, jalapenos, green chilli peppers, peeled and chopped beefsteak tomatoes, scallions, and a touch of cilantro. Our peppers are transplanted from their original site in French Guiana to a private orchard outside Matamoros, where parallel climate ripens them to produce the hot capsicum extract. Our master chef Pablo grinds the pepper to a fine powder. Soaks them in brine to “loosen” the flavour, then marries them to the tomatoes in our special sharp vinegar.

This copywriting style might be most suitable for this product if you are selling to chefs and food connoisseurs.

Informational/Educational Copy

Although this copywriting style might not lend itself well to the sample product of salsa, it can work well for products such as software, garden supplies, electronics, and chemicals.

Cilantro is the fresh leaf of the coriander plant. This delicate fragrant-pungent leaf is one of the oldest spices known to man. When the Romans used finely chopped cilantro to season their bread, the spices had been known for thousands of years. Each 14 oz. bottle of “Hell-Fire” salsa includes both cilantro and…

Snob Appeal Copy

According to Lewis, the style of copywriting works when snobbery is in vogue. The copy, layout and illustration need to match perfectly for Snob Appeal copy to work.

Only 1,200 bottles…ever, this entire year. Our exclusive “Hell-Fire” Salsa is made from such rare herbs, under such rigidly controlled conditions, that only 1,200 bottles will be available this year. We must limit any purchase to two bottles (subject to availability, of course). Each numbered bottle carries the Seal of Elegance. Handsomely gift boxed for your favorite gourmet who cannot obtain this elsewhere. 14 ounces, twenty-nine dollars.

I Am the Greatest Copy

This copywriting style speaks for itself. Those who believe it’s the best product will buy, and the rest probably won’t. The challenge is answering the question: Better than what? Discerning buyers want proof that it’s better.

The Best Salsa. In comparisons tests, our Kitchen Board rated this salsa superior in consistency, palatability, and flavor. Unlike other sauces tested, “Hell-Fire” contains genuine tomatoes and fresh spices, producing a greater degree of effectiveness, when applied to both tortillas and salads. $2.49, unconditionally guaranteed.

Plain Vanilla Copy

This copywriting style might be the right choice if you want to keep it simple and give your readers a break from too much text. Lewis recommends it for multi-product catalogues of household staples.

“Hell-Fire” Hot Salsa–14 oz. bottle. Ingredients: red peppers, jalapenos, green chilli peppers, beefsteak tomatoes, scallions, cilantro. $2.49.

Choosing the right copywriting style for your catalogue or website will depend a number of factors including your industry, products and market. Lewis notes that readers can get bored with one copywriting style if it’s overused. For catalogues, he recommends breaking the catalogue into themed sections and using one style in each section. Although How to Write Powerful Catalog Copy was written before the widespread use of the Internet, you can apply this advice to ecommerce websites as well.

Note: How to Write Powerful Catalog Copy is no longer in print but can be purchased from used book websites such as  Alibris and Abebooks.

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When faced with the prospect of writing a proposal to win business, do you think of a thousand other things you would rather be doing?

Writing a business proposal isn’t as bad as it seems when you understand the elements needed for an effective proposal.

Each business proposal will have different requirements, depending on the project, industry and the information sought by the company requesting the proposal.

Understanding the elements that are found in most business proposals will give you a confidence the next time you need to write a business proposal.

Executive summary of a business proposal

The executive summary outlines the main points you will cover in more detail in the body of the business proposal. This is an important part of the business proposal because busy decision makers might not have time to read the full proposal and will rely on the executive summary when making a decision. In many situations, you’ll want to write the executive summary first ─ it can serve as your outline while helping you determine the most important information to include in your business proposal.

The current situation

One way to begin this section of the business proposal is to explain the customer’s problem and how you plan to solve it. Doing the research to gain an understanding of their challenge shows that you are truly concerned and have their best interests at heart. Closely analysing their needs will also help you come up with the best solution.

Products and/or services offered in a business proposal

This is where you detail what you plan to supply under the proposal. You can cover a number of areas including:

• benefits –  Will your solution save time, save money, increase safety, increase sales?
• delivery – How will your product or service be delivered, implemented and followed up?
• quality assurance – What quality control measures are in place – recruitment procedures, training, safety procedures, product warranties?
• timeframe – When will services or products be delivered? What are the milestone dates for long-term projects?
• approach – How do you plan to deliver your services or products? Why should the customer choose you instead of competitors? What makes you different?

The company and personnel section of a business proposal

In this section of the business proposal you highlight your company’s history, abilities and achievements. Include descriptions of the key people who will be involved in delivering the product or service. If it’s a large project with many team members, include an organisational chart showing the management structure. Explain how each person’s training and experience will be applied to create the outcome the customer wants.

You might include case studies in the business proposal that show successes with similar projects in the past. If possible, show tangible results of your product or service – for example, “Our safety products and system design reduced workplace accidents by 25 per cent”.

Costs in your business proposal

This section of the business proposal will vary depending on the type of contract you are bidding on. When supplying products, your price may be a fixed amount. For bidding to supply services, the pricing in your business proposal might be based on cost-plus, materials and labour, cost-reimbursement, or some other method. Whatever pricing structure you use, it’s important to provide detail of costs and budgets by breaking these down.

Covering all bases

Regardless of how you decide to organise and format your business proposal, it’s essential to cover all the information requested by your potential customer. If you receive a request for proposal document, be sure that you address all the points in it. If you have been asked to submit a less formal proposal, ask questions to determine what the client is looking for when choosing a supplier.

Feel confident writing a business proposal

Understanding the elements outlined here and keeping the customer’s needs and concerns in mind will increase your chances of success when submitting a business proposal. It will also help you overcome fear and procrastination the next time you are called upon to write a business proposal.